All my life, I believed I was abandoned

My hurt was always one-sided. I missed my birthmother so much that it hurt. Adoptees have a hard enough time getting acknowledgement for our own trauma and loss. The idea that birthparents were affected or felt guilt, shame, or depression after the separation is hard to fathom in the version of the story (crafted by the Chinese government) where birthparents had a "choice" the entire time.

Every time there is a birthparent reunion, I am shocked at how the birthparents seem to be filled with guilt. Guilt. Can you imagine? Guilt for being threatened, coerced, forced, and tricked? GUILT? It fills you with indignation, the injustice of it all. 

You murder my puppy and I apologize to you. It's unfathomable.